ELLE ... HIGH SCHOOL BOUND

(written September 2004)

As some of you may know, my daughter Elle graduated from Holy Angels this past Spring. For those of you who don't know who I am, I drive the 15-passenger almost-filled-to-capacity green Ford van (and NO, they are NOT all my children).

As I sat through retreats, award ceremonies and graduation, I reflected on Elle's Catholic education to date. Believe me, as we progressed through the awards, and I awaited the "most consecutive good hair days" honor (Elle was a shoe-in) there was more than ample time for such ponderings.

To date, I figure Elle's education has cost the Yenny family approximately $23,000 (being a product of Catholic education myself, I was able to calculate this number in my head). Once the shock of this calculation wore off, my mind naturally wandered to an accounting of what we have received in return for that sum:

I had the pleasure and honor of watching Elle actively participate in at least 20 school-morning masses. Needless to say, on her wedding day she will know her way around the alter much better than her mom did.

Elle sang and danced in nine Christmas shows that were actually about Christmas! They weren't "Winter Celebrations" or, God help us, "Sparkle Days". They were celebrations of the birth of Jesus and I heard her sing songs on key (she certainly didn't learn that at home) that varied from "Away in the Manger" to "Silent Night".

I drove Elle to school approximately 1,800 times, and she gets all the credit for the lack of tardies since she found my keys at least 1,795 times.

I attended more-than-I-can-count fundraisers. As I helped myself to seconds at the dessert table at each function, I reminded myself that my reward would be in Heaven (God willing); not in the petite section at The Gap.

I had the joy of attending parent-teacher conferences where each teacher knew Elle by name and personality. Unfortunately, they also knew me and her brothers by name and personality, but they never held it against her.

There were many trips to the emergency room, some when Elle was the injured party and some when it was one of her brothers, and each time she was treated with care and compassion at Holy Angels. Nothing says love like a bag of frozen peas being held to your split-open forehead by your PE teacher.

I signed hundreds of tests, quizzes and homework assignments. While irritated with the constant signing, I was gratified by the scores I saw and thank each and every one of her teachers.

Elle participated in four science fairs. Enough said. Have I mentioned my latest idea for a fundraiser? Tell the parents you are thinking about canceling all science projects. Then pass the hat.

Thanks to Holy Angels, Elle has begun her high years prepared and ready for a new challenge. If her next four years are as successful as her last nine, we have Holy Angels to thank. And if her high school years are less than successful ... well, we can always blame the media.